


The daisies we saw that day

by mrs_iwaizumi



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Aobajousai, Boys In Love, Crushes, Declarations Of Love, Falling In Love, First Dates, Flowers, Friendship/Love, Hurt No Comfort, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm Sorry, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru Angst, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru Fluff, Love, Lung Cancer, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining Iwaizumi Hajime, Pining Oikawa Tooru, Sorry Not Sorry, daisies, daisy - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-08
Updated: 2020-10-08
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:15:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26901973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mrs_iwaizumi/pseuds/mrs_iwaizumi
Summary: You are my daisy.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 9
Kudos: 117





	The daisies we saw that day

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys!  
> Before you start reading this story I need to let you know that I usually wrote this late at night and didn't exactly correct my mistakes and any possible typos.  
> And english isn’t my first language, so i hope you can look past a few possible punctuation/grammar mistakes!
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy reading this story!

Iwaizumi was stressed, like always. Not only was school getting challenging but nationals were just around the corner, which meant that Oikawa and the team would want to practice as much as possible. Not that he minded, he was just so exhausted all the time, he felt like he couldn’t breathe. He woke up in the morning, got ready for school, went to practice, went to class, practiced some more, came home and studied, ate and then he went to sleep, that’s what his day looked like. He never got a break, he always had something to do and his health was not benefitting from that.

There was one small thing that bothered him, he got out of breath quickly, which was weird since his endurance was really good, but it’s probably because he’s so tired. No one on the team has noticed yet, so it almost certainly isn’t anything to worry about. But the ace was noticeably worn out, Oikawa saw it. His eyes looked different; they weren’t as bright as usual. His movements were also slower than normal. Something was going on, Oikawa knew it, he had a gut feeling, but he couldn’t just walk up to Iwaizumi and ask him what was going on. The ace would throw a volleyball at him and say “Shittykawa, get back to practice, I’m fine!” Oikawa hated how stubborn Iwaizumi was, it really isn’t easy to talk to a hot-head like him. Even though Oikawa loved Iwaizumi, as a friend of course, he had to say that he’s never met as big of a pain in the ass as Iwaizumi. He had to come up with a plan so that Iwaizumi would tell him what was going on. He saw Iwaizumi walking towards the school and he decided that he should jog to him and start talking about what their practice sessions are going to look like now that nationals were coming close.

Tooru was about to call for the ace when a group of girls gathered around him. They were all squealing his name and desperately trying to talk or touch him in any way possible. Oikawa usually really enjoyed talking to his ‘fangirls’ but now he really had to get to Iwaizumi. He tried politely telling them he had to go practice but they wouldn’t listen, they just continued asking him questions and telling him how much they loved him. They made drawings, cookies and many other things, and even though the setter really appreciated the gesture, he really had to leave. He tried coming up with other excuses but they still didn’t let him go. That was until he felt someone hold his hand, intertwine their fingers and politely say: “Hey girls, I’m sorry, but Oikawa has to come to practice now. Nothing works without the captain. Come on, Babyboy, let’s go!” At first, Oikawa didn’t recognize whose voice it was, it sounded so strangely familiar yet something was off. He saw all the girls apologize and start to leave and that’s when he realized whose hand he was holding. He felt his face instantly heat up and he ripped his hand out of Iwaizumi’s own. “You know, Iwa-chan, I would’ve been able to get away by myself, also, what was that all about,” Oikawa said as laid-back as possible while trying to hide the blush that formed on his cheeks. Iwaizumi let out a laugh and turned to look at him. “It didn’t look like it when you were so desperately trying to tell them you had practice,” Iwaizumi started mocking Oikawa and ignored his question. “Iwa-chan, you’re so mean,” Oikawa whined and looked at Iwaizumi with puppy eyes. The ace couldn’t help but giggle at that. Iwaizumi didn’t exactly know why he went to help Oikawa, it’s just that every time he sees all these girls around Oikawa, he feels sick, he just wants to go there and get Oikawa away from them. He doesn’t like to admit it but he gets insanely jealous of his fan-girls, they get to spend a lot of time with Oikawa, not that he minded, it’s just that Oikawa was his best friend so shouldn’t he be the one spending time with the setter. So when he saw Oikawa surrounded by all those girls, he had to get them away from him. Maybe he overdid it a bit by pretending to be his boyfriend but Oikawa wasn’t complaining about it so maybe it wasn’t that bad. “Also, Iwa-chan, did you have to pretend to be my boyfriend?” Iwaizumi didn’t know what to say so he kind of just stopped walking and coughed. At first, he was coughing on purpose but after a few coughs he couldn’t stop. He felt like he was out of breath. Oikawa rushed to his side and made him sit down, he wanted to give Iwaizumi some water but that wouldn’t help. 

They sat there for a bit until the ace calmed down and was able to somewhat breathe again. He felt dizzy and his knees felt weak, he didn’t know if he would be able to stand up on his own. Oikawa looked really concerned, he didn’t know what to do or how to help Iwaizumi, he froze. He didn’t mean to, he wanted to help him but he didn’t know how. He started to tear up. “Iwa-chan, I’m sorry,” two tears fell down Oikawa’s cheeks. Iwaizumi’s eyes widened; he didn’t expect for the setter to react like this. “Hey, it’s okay, I’m okay, come on now, let’s go to practice. I bet they’re all waiting and you know how mad Kunimi gets when we’re late,” Iwaizumi reached for Oikawa’s hand to calm him down. “Ew, I’m so stupid, I’m sorry,” Oikawa’s smile was back again, the only smile that was able to make Iwaizumi forget about everything he was ever worried about. Both men stood up and started walking toward the gym. They talked about how tough the next few months leading up to nationals are going to be. It was a normal conversation, almost too normal.

The next few weeks passed quickly. With school and practice Iwaizumi didn’t have any time for himself. His health progressively worsened, he didn’t know why, he felt like his lungs weren’t working the way they should, he felt weak but he didn’t do anything about it, he was sure everything would go back to normal once they had nationals behind them. 

\----------------------

There was one thing that Iwaizumi didn’t like. It was that he woke up at two in the morning every day. It usually happened after he had a dream of confessing his ‘feelings’ to Oikawa. He didn’t have a crush on him or anything, it’s just that he didn’t want Tooru to be with anyone else, or ignore him and he loved teasing him, he didn’t mean any of it, it was fun seeing Oikawa ‘mad’.  
All his thoughts were messing with him, and he’s had enough.  
He picked his phone up and dialled the first person’s number that came into his mind. He knew it was early but he needed help, he needed someone who would help him sort out his feelings, because waking up with tears streaming down one’s face couldn’t mean anything good. He hoped for him to pick up, Iwaizumi rarely admitted it, but he really needed help now. 

“Hello, Hajime, are you alright? It’s like two in the morning,” Matsukawa spoke, his voice low and raspy. He was slightly confused about why Iwaizumi would call him this early in the morning but he knew that he wouldn’t have called if it wasn’t serious.  
“Hey, Issei, I’m sorry, I know it’s early but I really need your help,” Iwaizumi’s voice broke and more tears fell down his face. Iwaizumi knew he was being a bother and he knew Mattsun would rather be sleeping than dealing with his problems but he needed his friend’s support.  
“Iwaizumi, do you want me to come over, you usually don’t call me unless it’s really urgent,” Matsukawa yawned and started getting out of bed.  
“No, I’m disturbing you at this time, you shouldn’t have to come over, I don’t want to bother you more than I already have,” Iwaizumi sniffled and tried to stop his teammate from coming over which would’ve made Iwaizumi feel even worse.  
“Well, I’m on my way already, I’ll be there in five,” Matsukawa said and hung up. Iwaizumi didn’t know how to react but it was too late to keep Issei from coming over now. Iwaizumi looked like a mess, nobody’s ever seen him look like this but he didn’t care anymore.  
He patiently waited for Matsukawa to knock on his door and once he finally did Iwaizumi opened the door in seconds and hugged Issei. He started crying again, Issei started rubbing circles on the ace’s back to try and calm him down.  
“Come on, tell me, what’s going on,” Matsukawa quietly spoke. He let himself into the house, took his shoes off and lead both of them to Iwaizumi’s room.  
There Iwaizumi started telling him about Oikawa and how confused he was. About how he loved being around him, he loved it so much that he hated it. Matsukawa just sat there and listened to everything Iwaizumi was telling him. He knew exactly what was going on, Hajime had a crush on Oikawa. Honestly, Mattsun was surprised it took the ace so long to finally figure that out. The whole team, except Oikawa, knew. They’d all been observing him during practice and it was so clear that the two best friends were pining after one another, yet neither of them dared say anything about it.

“Iwa, don’t worry about it, I know exactly what we’re going to do,” and with that Matsukawa told Iwaizumi about the plan him and Hanamaki had schemed a while back.

\----------------------

Iwaizumi was nervous, so nervous that his hands were sweating. His heart was beating out of his chest and his mouth was dry. The only time he was ever this nervous was when… never. Iwaizumi has never felt this uneasy before. It was almost like his gut was telling him to stop moving and think about what he was going to do next. He felt light headed and his fear only grew bigger when he remembered he would have to do this alone. Hanamaki and Mattsun told him he should be on his own in the gym when Oikawa walks in. He tried asking Kunimi to be there but he said his ‘virgin eyes’ didn’t feel like seeing a make out session between his captain and the teams ace today, Iwaizumi should’ve known Kunimi would say something like that. Whatever, he’ll be fine, right? 

He felt his knees go weak at the thought of Oikawa rejecting him. He leaned against the wall but his legs were too weak to hold him up so he slid down, hitting the floor with a light thud, he started coughing again. Yet this time the cough felt different, it was less dry, and it left behind the flavour of blood in his mouth. But Iwaizumi didn’t have time to dealt with his health right now, of course he was worried about what it could be, but right now the more important thing was that he was going to confess to Oikawa. He looked around the gym, it was beautiful. The team really tried their best to make it look as romantic as possible. There were so many flowers and candles everywhere, Iwaizumi even put on a suit since he had to look classy, if someone were to walk in right now this would’ve looked like a marriage proposal. But no, it was just Iwaizumi Hajime asking his life-long crush, a.k.a. his best friend, a.k.a. the Oikawa Tooru to be his boyfriend. 

\----------------------

The team walked into the gym; Iwaizumi was already standing there waiting for them. “Where the hell were you, we won’t have enough time to set this all up, now hurry up!” Iwaizumi started bossing everyone around. “Geez, calm down, we have half an hour,” Kunimi complained and started doing what Iwaizumi told him to. Kindaichi didn’t really care for this, he would much rather start practice early but Matsukawa told him that ‘love is the greatest gift of all, but you wouldn’t understand’ so now he was trying to figure out what exactly he meant by that. Kyoutani followed Iwaizumi’s orders and was actually the most helpful of them all. Kunimi was just whining around, Kindaichi was trying to understand what Mattsun meant by what he said, Hanamaki and Matsukawa were all over each other, Watari and Yahaba were lighting all the candles, Kyoutani was just helping where Iwaizumi told him to and everyone else was just kind of there and looked around if their help was needed.  
He told everyone to head out as soon as they were done and he ran to the changing rooms and changed into his beautiful black suit. He wore a white shirt underneath and a dark green tie, which looked really good with his eyes. He chose to wear this tie because it was the one Oikawa gave him last Christmas and he decided to cherish it for a special moment, Iwaizumi thought today would be an appropriate day to wear it, since it was a special occasion. He held a box of chocolates and a bouquet, which seemed kind of clichéd but that’s how Oikawa was and Iwaizumi was fully aware of that. He walked back into the gym, his nerves getting the best of him. Hanamaki and Matsukawa were standing there and admired Iwaizumi. “Good luck, man!” both of them exclaimed and quickly hugged him before running out of the gym as fast as possible. And just like that, Iwaizumi was left there on his own to wait for Tooru to finally show up to practice. 

\----------------------

Obviously, Oikawa knew nothing about what Iwaizumi planned on doing, he was far too caught up with the thought of what Hajime’s cough could be. He really thought Iwaizumi should listen to him every once in a while, and do what he tells him to but Hajime is just so stubborn it’s almost impossible to change his mind once he’s set on doing (or in this case, NOT doing) something. Oikawa walked into the changing rooms just like he did every day when he went to practice. Nobody was there yet, so Oikawa guessed their lessons ran a bit late, which was totally okay, he would start preparing the gym on his own, which would also give him some time to think about how he would convince Hajime to go to the doctor. He could technically just tell him he had to go buy something and ask Iwa to come with him but secretly drag him to the doctor’s office, of course, Iwaizumi would be really mad at Oikawa if he did that but Tooru was only looking out for his best friend’s health.

Oikawa knew that the ‘friendship’ between Iwaizumi and him was so much more than just that but he didn’t know how to talk to Iwaizumi about it, plus Hajime dated plenty of girls so maybe he didn’t feel like being in a relationship anymore. Oikawa sighed and sat down, putting his head in his hands. He was so stressed, he was so scared, he didn’t know what to do. He didn’t have a good feeling about Iwaizumi’s health, especially with nationals coming up. He knew Iwaizumi would overwork himself until he couldn’t take it anymore, he always did that. Oikawa didn’t know how to talk to him anymore since just telling Hajime he was worried about him wasn’t enough. He didn’t know whether he should just pick a fight with him, which maybe isn’t the best idea since Iwaizumi is much stronger than Oikawa, but at least then he would be finally able to tell him what he thinks. Surprisingly, Iwaizumi always listens to Oikawa when he’s shouting, yelling and is almost on the verge of tears. It was settled, Oikawa would just have to yell at Iwaizumi, which would be easy thinking about how frustrated this whole situation made him feel. Oikawa decided not to dwell on it too much right now and just concentrate on practicing and if he found the right moment, he would very casually strike up a conversation with Iwaizumi and just start yelling at him for no reason, that’ll be fun.

\----------------------

Oikawa slowly got up and walked towards the door which lead to the short hallway between the changing rooms and the gym. Oikawa’s pace was slow, he wasn’t too excited for practice today, he felt sick, almost as if his stomach was turning, but he didn’t know why, he had no reason to feel that way. He slowly slid the gym door open, his eyes were glued to the floor, he didn’t feel like looking up, but when he noticed the gym being so much darker than usual his head shot up and he looked around. 

His and Iwa’s song, This Side of Paradise, was playing.  
Candles?  
Why in the actual hell are there candles in the gym?  
He heard someone move, he tried looking around to figure out where that sound was coming from.  
“Iwa-chan, is this you, am I disturbing?” Oikawa asked, still trying to figure out what was going on.

Someone behind him cleared their throat. Oikawa’s body turned around so quickly and when he finally realized who he was standing in front of, he couldn’t help but get a bit flustered, Iwaizumi did look really handsome in that suit. Hajime didn’t know where to start, he went over this so many times in his head but actually standing in front of Tooru and having to tell him everything to his face was very different from having Matsukawa tell him how he confessed to Hanamaki. They did help him get his thoughts straight but standing here in front of Oikawa made Hajime forget everything they ever told him about confessing. 

Iwaizumi gave Oikawa the bouquet of daisies he was holding. Oikawa looked up to meet Iwaizumi eyes. Tooru wasn’t expecting this at all. 

“O-oikawa, look, I need to tell you quite a few things so if you wouldn’t mind maybe listening,” Oikawa was taken off guard by Iwaizumi being so genuinely charming. Oikawa giggled slightly in response and nodded his head. “We’ve known each other for so long and I know I can be an asshole sometimes and I know I say mean things often but I honestly couldn’t imagine not having you in my life. Even though you can be a really annoying person I guess I, for some stupid reason, still love you. I love everything about you. The way your eyes sparkle when you set the ball, the way your hair looks, your smile, the way you talk, everything. I guess I never realized how much you actually mean to me until we started looking into possible universities we could go to. I recognized we might not actually choose to go to the same school anymore and that thought made me go insane. I can’t stand being away from you, I really can’t, it- it’s physically painful. I hate the fact that we might not live close to each other ever again. But what I hate the most is thinking that I might’ve missed my chance at being happy with you because I was too scared to accept my feelings for you. So, Oikawa, I am quite literally embarrassing myself in front of you and putting our friendship on the line just to ask you this question, so you better think about it carefully. O-Tooru, do you want to go out with me and- b-be my boyfriend?” Iwaizumi’s voice got really quiet when he said the word “boyfriend”. He was blushing, he tried hiding his face by looking down but Oikawa held his chin up so he could look in the other man’s eyes. Both of them were smiling. Oikawa’s eyes were glassy.  
“So, is that a yes or-?” Iwaizumi started but was cut off by Oikawa’s lips crashing on his own. It took Iwaizumi off-guard but quickly melted into the kiss as soon as he was able to comprehend what just happened. Oikawa reciprocated his feelings? So Hanamaki and Matsukawa really weren’t lying about it. “Yes, Iwa-chan, of course it’s a yes,” Oikawa broke the kiss off. Iwaizumi’s lips were tingling from the kiss, he wanted more, he didn’t ever want to let Oikawa go. “You wore the tie I gave you, Iwa-chan,” Oikawa giggled, “you said you would only wear it to special occasions!” Iwaizumi smiled at him, his face wasn’t able to do anything else. He felt like telling everyone how happy he was, he couldn’t wait to be able to call Oikawa his boyfriend, his real, actual boyfriend. It took him a while to put his pride aside and ask Oikawa out. But now that he did it, he felt like screaming at the top of his lungs. He didn’t care about what anyone might say, he was just happy to finally be with Oikawa. 

“Honestly Iwa-chan, why’d it take you so long to finally ask me out?” Oikawa looked at Iwaizumi, whose face was now even redder than it was a few moments ago. Oikawa couldn’t help but smile at the sight in front of him. He’s never seen Hajime so flustered and he was ecstatic to be the reason behind the man’s blush, he knew it was hard for Iwaizumi to be this open and honest about his feelings, Oikawa was really glad he was trying. “Oh, well, I mean, I guess I just realized I had feelings for you and I tried to push them away but then Mattsun and Hanamaki told me I should shoot my shot since you never know-,” Iwaizumi started talking but was interrupted by Oikawa looking at him. His eyes were wide and his mouth hung open. “So, they told you, didn’t they?” Oikawa asked Iwaizumi who only nodded in response. “I knew you would’ve never had the courage to ask me out if you weren’t sure of the outcome!” the setter started giggling, his smile was as bright as ever. He hugged Iwaizumi and kissed his cheek. “Thank you, Iwa-Chan,” his voice was trembling, tears started rolling down his cheeks. He tried staying strong and not start crying for once but he was just so happy to finally be able to call the ace his own. He couldn’t stop crying yet the smile on his face never faltered. 

And for once everything seemed like it was going to be okay. The team looked at the two finally being able to talk about their feelings for one another. Hanamaki and Matsukawa were glad they wouldn’t be getting any calls from either of them at two a.m. where they were sobbing over the phone because they didn’t know about their, not so silly, crushes on each other. They would now finally be able to go on all the dates they wanted to go on together. Maybe they would stop putting as much pressure on themselves since they now had someone to rely on.

Kunimi looked as disgusted as ever, which didn’t surprise anyone on the team. When he was Mattsun and Hanamaki making out next to him, he pretended to puke and ran away as fast as possible. The couple just glanced over at him and giggled happily. 

They didn’t get to practice today since Iwaizumi and Oikawa decided it would be a great idea to take the day off and the team didn’t even question it. They weren’t about to ask why because to be frank, everyone knew why they wanted to have the afternoon to themselves. Kindaichi looked like he was about to murder someone and when Iwaizumi asked him what was wrong, he just looked at him and said “How the fuck can you be in love with Oikawa-Senpai?” Iwaizumi just looked at him and giggled. “Trust me, Kindaichi, once you’ll fall in love, you’ll understand, but for now you just don’t know what you’re talking about.” Kindaichi looked like he was about to explode, why was everyone telling him that he didn’t know what he was talking about? Something that scared him was seeing Iwaizumi happy, and he’s never seen him this happy so he was ready to run out of the gym as fast as possible. But before Oikawa and Iwaizumi were able to leave, Hanamaki and Matsukawa quickly ran up to them and congratulated them and laughed at Iwaizumi for not being able to put his pride aside and when Oikawa laughed along, they just looked at him and said “what’re you laughing at, Iwaizumi wasn’t the only one calling me at two a.m. crying because the other wasn’t paying enough attention to you,” Oikawa just looked at the floor and started blushing, that’s when Iwaizumi joined the laughter. He was happy, he finally was genuinely happy.

\----------------------

The next day the captain and the ace came to school holding hands. Both wore a huge smile on their faces. They came to practice earlier than usual, which surprised everyone quite a bit. The whole team was happy to see their captain and ace not fighting for once, they didn’t know whether that was a good thing or whether they should be concerned, but for now everything seemed to be going well. 

Practice was the same as usual, the only thing that was slightly different was that Iwaizumi and Oikawa seemed to be working together even better. They understood each other without having to communicate. They would look at one another, a small blush on both their faces, and they would smile, a pure and genuine smile. Sometimes they would glance at the other while he wasn’t looking and to be honest, no one on the team thought they would act that way. They were happy, everybody could tell.

Hanamaki and Matsukawa were really glad the two men finally found each other. Even though it took them much longer than expected, they finally would be able to be happy. Both of them deserved it, and a plus of this whole situation is that now they would be able to fully concentrate on going to nationals. The team was glad the two were finally together, they were now officially dating. 

“Hey, Babyboy!” Iwaizumi exclaimed while he walked into the changing rooms. He was alone with Oikawa since they left a bit earlier so they’d be able to get to class on time since they had an English exam first thing in the morning. Oikawa still wasn’t used to Iwaizumi being so loving towards him. He turned around and hugged Iwaizumi, he was so overwhelmed, he was so happy he felt like he could cry. He wasn’t used to feeling this happy, he wasn’t used to having his dreams come true, he wasn’t used to feeling loved. Yes, he had so many fans but they only loved him for his looks, but Iwaizumi was different. Iwaizumi was always there for him, he helped him stand back up when he felt like completely giving up. And even though Oikawa might seem like one of the cockiest, most confident people out there, Iwaizumi knew how scared of failure he was, he knew how scared he was to let down his friends, he was scared of being left alone. 

“I had an idea,” Iwaizumi started and waited for some sort of answer from his boyfriend who looked up and nodded his head in response. “Would you like to go on a date with me this Saturday?” Iwaizumi slightly blushed after he asked the question. For some reason the voice in his head told him Oikawa would say no, turn around and leave. But his doubt immediately left when Oikawa was basically jumping around the changing rooms screaming “yes” and “I’ve been waiting for this!” 

Iwaizumi was really glad to see Oikawa so happy. He quickly changed, kissed Oikawa, told him he’ll see him in class and left. Tooru was left there standing with the biggest grin. 

Oh god was he excited.

\----------------------

Today was the day. Oikawa was getting ready to go on his first date with Iwaizumi. Since he didn’t want to tell him where they would go and he didn’t want to ‘spoil the surprise’ by giving Oikawa any hints, he had no clue on what he should wear. He looked outside the window, the weather was perfect, it was sunny and warm, there were no clouds in the sky and the air was fresh. He decided to wear some simple black pants, a lavender button down and some vans. Today, he took particularly long to do his hair. He put on some rings and sprayed on some of his favourite cologne. He was really nervous to go on this date with Iwaizumi. He’s known the man since he was little and they hung out really often, usually every day, but this was different, this was a real date. Oikawa was worried that for some reason Hajime would stop liking him now that he was his boyfriend, which honestly is kind of stupid but then again, what do you expect from a teenage boy who was asked on a date by his life-long crush? He was humming along to some of the songs he was listening to while dancing around his room. He walked into the bathroom, brushed his teeth and took a hair brush out of a drawer, he closed the door behind him and started singing along to the songs. The mirror reflected his each and every move, his smile growing larger by the second and then reality hit him again, he was going to go a date with Hajime, finally, after years and years of hoping and wishing for it to finally happen. He started to feel sick and light-headed for some reason, he didn’t feel good about the date anymore. He walked down stairs, his legs kind of shaky, he had to hold on to the railing with both hands just to make sure he wouldn’t accidentally slip and fall down the stairs.

His parents were both sitting in the kitchen chatting about something Oikawa didn’t really payed attention to. “Mom, Iwaizumi is going to be here in a few minutes, so I’m going to be leaving soon, okay?” Oikawa looked at his mom who only nodded in response, a bright smile appearing on her face. She knew Oikawa liked Iwaizumi long before he knew it. Oikawa’s voice was a bit shaky but she didn’t think anything of it, she knew how nervous Oikawa was about today, because if he weren’t, he wouldn’t have called Matsukawa at three in the morning asking for any kind of advice.

One day when he was about twelve years old, he came home after playing outside with Iwaizumi all afternoon. He was smiling as brightly as ever; a slight blush was on his face. He ran to the kitchen where his mom was preparing dinner and started telling her about how much fun he had with Hajime today. And when she asked why he had so much fun, he said “We caught a bug Iwa-chan was trying to catch for so long, he was so happy when we finally caught it! And then he hugged me goodbye!” Oikawa’s blush deepened a bit and his smile somehow grew even bigger, “Also, he for once didn’t laugh at my alien stories but he actually listened to me and he said he found them interesting!” Oikawa was now jumping through the kitchen, he felt and looked so truly happy. Oikawa’s mom only looked at him, she didn’t say anything other than that she was so glad he had a good time with Hajime today. She knew one day both boys would realize what this friendship actually was, it would take a while but she knew that one day, this would be so much more than friendship.

“Have fun, sweetie!” she said as Oikawa was putting on his shoes, ready to run out of the house as soon as Hajime texted him. “I will! Don’t wait for me, I will probably come home late!” he answered and checked his phone. It was 4:58p.m., which meant that the ace would be here soon. Oikawa’s heart was beating so fast, he thought it would quite literally beat out of his chest. His hands were sweating and his knees felt shaky, but he couldn’t wipe the smile off his face. He’d never been as excited as now, he couldn’t wait for Iwaizumi to finally show up.

Little did Oikawa know that on the other side of the door Iwaizumi was mentally breaking down over what he would say to the setter first. What if he would be left speechless by his date’s looks? Oh, who was he kidding, he was always left speechless by Oikawa’s looks. He didn’t like to admit it in front of other but he truly thought Oikawa was beautiful inside and out, even though he could be really selfish and mean sometimes, Iwaizumi understood him and loved him for everything he was. He was more nervous now than when he was confessing to Oikawa. Why though? The date he planned was perfect, the weather was perfect for the date, he tried looking decent and he did, he was wearing grey pants, an emerald green button down and some white Air Force 1’s. A silver chain was hanging around his neck and he was wearing a beautiful silver watch to match. He actually tried styling his hair today since Oikawa once told him that he wouldn’t want to go out with a porcupine. He still looked like a porcupine but at least he looked like a groomed one. He raised his hand to knock on the door but his hand froze a few inches in front of the door, he didn’t know how to handle his nervousness. Before games he was great at keeping calm but now for some reason, he was freaking out more than ever. He felt his throat scratching again, it’s been happening more often lately, he felt like he had to cough every few steps but he was still able to keep it together, even though sometimes he did get much more tired quicker. But Iwaizumi didn’t have time to think about his stupid cough, he had more important things to think about. This is just going to be Oikawa and him hanging out like always, except it wasn’t. This wasn’t just some sort of day they were both bored and decided to watch some movies together, no, this was going to be a real date. And with the thought of that his hand sunk down again. He wasn’t able to get himself to knock. It was 5 p.m., he had to let Oikawa know he was here or he would get upset and Iwaizumi didn’t want to see him mad, not on their first date. He didn’t want to think anymore so he just knocked on the door, expecting to get a few moments to pull himself together but was surprised when the door opened in less than a second. He looked at the man standing in front of him. Oikawa looked so handsome. He just looked so breathtakingly good. Iwaizumi didn’t know what to say, he just stood there, his mouth gaped open, his breath hitched. He looked Oikawa up and down and started blushing intensely, he tried to hide his face by covering it with his hands but Oikawa didn’t allow him to do so by putting his hand on the ace’s cheek. “Don’t hide your face, you look so good,” Oikawa was also blushing, he didn’t know how Iwaizumi would react to his touch but he decided to risk it, he leaned in closer and kissed him. He felt Iwaizumi stiffen up. Hajime was surprised by Oikawa kissing him, his eyes shot open and he didn’t know what to do. The setter was about to pull away since Iwaizumi didn’t seem to be okay with the kiss until he started kissing him back. Oikawa was relieved Iwaizumi was okay with him being bold for once and making the second ‘first move’. 

They pulled away after a few moments. Both men’s eyes seemed to be shining, they couldn’t stop looking at each other. Everything was perfect, they were in their own world, the sun was shining and the sky was blue. It was warm and everything was just the way it should be. Both the men knew this was going to be a great day, they forgot all about their fears and decided to focus on one another. “Bye mom, I’m leaving, Iwaizumi is here!” Oikawa yelled and closed the door behind him. “O-Tooru, you look, you- you look really good,” Iwaizumi started blushing again and looked down to his shoes. “Thank you, Iwa, you look really good yourself,” Oikawa answered and tried keeping his cool but that was getting kind of difficult, he started to furiously blush. Iwaizumi was about to lead him to the car but Oikawa stopped walking and turned away from Hajime, so he wouldn’t be able to see the colour Oikawa’s face was. “Hey, are you okay, do you not want to go on this date?” Iwaizumi’s voice broke when he asked that question, he didn’t want Oikawa to feel uncomfortable with him, but he knew that if he got rejected by him it would rip his heart out. Oikawa’s head shot up, his eyes were wide, “Iwa-chan, why would you think that?” He was smiling, the blush on his face still present. For some reason he didn’t think Iwaizumi would even get the thought that he didn’t want to go on the date. He could see the embarrassment on his date’s face. Iwaizumi just looked at him and quietly said “I don’t know, maybe you changed your mind.” Iwaizumi felt kind of stupid saying these words aloud, but he knew Oikawa wouldn’t ever make fun of him about something serious. “Iwa, I didn’t know you were so insecure, why would I change my mind in the span of five seconds? You don’t know how long I’ve waited for this day to finally come. Please don’t ever think I don’t want to spend as much time as possible with you, I’m not leaving, ever,” Oikawa smiled at the ace, his eyes were so full of love for the man. His smile was so bright, Iwaizumi couldn’t help but start to smile, too. He took Oikawa’s hand in his own and looked at him. “Now come, I have a great evening planned for us,” he walked towards his car, his fingers were intertwined with Oikawa’s. He opened the door for him and the setter let out a giggle as he entered the car, Iwaizumi couldn’t help but smile at the sight in front of him, he felt his heart start to beat faster. He loved the way Oikawa made him feel, every time he was around him, he felt so happy, he felt cared for, he felt safe. 

Iwaizumi also got in the car and he noticed Oikawa took the AUX cord and was about to connect it to his phone. Iwaizumi looked at him, he looked so happy, it made Iwaizumi’s heart flutter, just seeing Oikawa being happy made him want to be with him forever so he could see him smile and hear his laugh. But today Iwaizumi would use the AUX cord. “Tooru, could you please give me the AUX this once?” Iwaizumi asked, Oikawa seemed kind of confused since he usually didn’t care about the music that was playing. He reluctantly gave him the cord, he looked like he wanted to ask Iwaizumi something but for some reason he didn’t say anything. Hajime noticed that Oikawa was sceptical about what Iwaizumi was going to do. “If you’re wondering why I took the AUX it’s because I made a playlist with songs that remind me of you,” a blush rose to Iwaizumi’s face, he wanted to look away so Oikawa wouldn’t see how embarrassed he was to be this romantic, but he also wanted to see the setters reaction to what he said. Oikawa’s eyes just widened in surprise, he looked like he was about to start crying, his eyes were glassy and Iwaizumi could see that his breaths were shaky. “I-iwa, I didn’t think you would ever do something like this for me, you are so amazing!” and with that Oikawa’s smile returned to his face. Iwaizumi let the playlist play all the songs, it went from songs like ‘Borderline’ by Tame Impala all the way to songs like ‘Super Bass’ by Nicki Minaj. Oikawa sang along to each and every single song that played and he even forced Iwa to sing along and at first, he was really shy but after the third song they were both singing at the top of their lungs. They were having so much fun, they were laughing, singing and just enjoying the time they were spending together.

The car ride was not too long, it took them about forty-five minutes to get to the place Iwaizumi decided to bring Oikawa on the date. They parked the car somewhere on a hill, Oikawa had no clue about where they were, but the view was beautiful. Hajime told him that they would have to walk for about five more minutes and then they’d arrive. Oikawa was really excited to see what Iwaizumi planned for their first date. “Okay, I’m going to blindfold you, I’ll lead you so you only have to trust me. Also, don’t worry, I swear I won’t make you trip and fall, I know you love these pants too much to ruin them,” Iwaizumi said as he took a blindfold out of his pocket. “Wait, you remembered that I love these pants?” Oikawa was genuinely surprised that Iwaizumi remembered such little details about him. “Oh, um, yeah, I guess I do,” Iwaizumi didn’t like to admit it but he remembered so many things about Oikawa, it sometimes made him question quite a few things. He put the blindfold on Oikawa and lead him to the date spot.

Of course, he didn’t plan everything on his own, the team helped him, again, but honestly neither of them minded, they actually quite enjoyed seeing Iwaizumi so happy, he seemed like a completely different person. He told them that there is a beautiful field with daisies not too far away from where they lived and that he would like to bring Oikawa there since it was a really romantic spot and since it was usually empty so they would be able to be alone. They put a table and two chairs in the middle of the field and made some of Oikawa’s favourite food. Under the table they hid blankets and pillows in a basket so that they would be able to stargaze once the sun set. They bought some polaroid films so that they could take as many pictures with a polaroid camera as they wanted, and they would also be able to directly see the pictures. The table was beautifully set, and they hung some fairy lights underneath the table just so they would be able to turn them on once it gets a bit darker but not dark enough to stargaze. They honestly didn’t expect for Iwaizumi to be as much of a romantic as he was, they thought Oikawa would be the amorous one but maybe they should rethink that. It was fun seeing Iwaizumi being completely open to them about his feelings. They were all happy to help the ace have a perfect first date with their captain. They’ve never seen Oikawa in as good of a mood as he’s been in the past few days, and they’re guessing Iwaizumi is the reason for that good mood. 

“Okay, now be careful here,” Iwaizumi was holding Oikawa’s hands, slowly leading him to the table he set up. They were both laughing and having a great time. At first Oikawa didn’t really trust Iwaizumi but he seemed to be doing pretty good, and his pants were still intact, so now he fully put his trust in the ace and just waited to see where he would lead him to. He felt his feet step on something that felt like grass. They continued walking but Oikawa was getting impatient. “Iwa-chan, you’re not going to push me off a cliff now, are you?” at first Oikawa was just joking but knowing Iwaizumi he was actually kind of concerned. “Shut it Shittykawa, we’re almost there,” Iwaizumi didn’t mean to sound mean but he was just paying attention not to ruin Oikawa’s shoes or he would be the one getting pushed off a cliff tonight. “Mean, mean, Iwa-chan, I’m your boyfriend now, aren’t I? You should be more respectful toward me,” Oikawa was jokingly pouting. Iwaizumi didn’t reflect on his next action and kissed the captain. Both Tooru and Hajime himself were shocked by his sudden action, neither of them minded, it’s just both of them were surprised. Iwaizumi was lucky Oikawa was wearing that blindfold because he was blushing, a lot. “Hajime, I can literally see your blush through the blindfold, now may I take it off and kiss you again?” Oikawa giggled as he was about to take the blindfold off. “No, hold on, we aren’t there yet!” Iwaizumi stopped Tooru from taking off the mask from his eyes. “Welp, too late,” Oikawa ripped the blindfold off his eyes and crashed his lips on Iwaizumi’s before he had any time to react. Iwaizumi’s eyes stood wide open, he didn’t know what to do with his arms or how to breathe, but when Oikawa held his hands it was like everything suddenly came back to him and he melted into the kiss.

They pulled away slowly. The sky was already getting a bit darker, which made the field seem so much more magical than it did during the day. You were able to see the whole city from up here, it was beautiful, since it was the evening the town was full of lights from the buildings. Oikawa’s eyes scanned the field and saw the table standing a few feet away from them. He looked like he was about to start crying. “Hajime, this is so beautiful, you are, too, but the view a-and, everything, it’s-,” Oikawa didn’t know how to express what he was feeling. He was so overwhelmed but so happy at the same time, the only thing he could do was hug Iwaizumi. He knows how stressed Oikawa’s been the last few weeks. Nationals were coming up and the team was practicing as much as ever. Iwaizumi knew how much it meant to Oikawa and he was trying his best to support him in every way he possibly could. 

“Come, follow me, I’ll show you what I planned for us,” Iwaizumi smiled and started walking toward the set table. Oikawa was following him, his eyes were shining and the smile on his face was blinding. He showed him the table, there were candles and a few pictures of the two boys on it. The first picture was when they were little and Iwaizumi forced Oikawa to go outside to catch bugs, Oikawa didn’t like it but he didn’t protest. The second one was when they were a bit older and they were sitting in Oikawa’s living room watching one of his favourite movies. The third one was of then on their first day of school in their new school, Aoba Johsai. They were both smiling, Oikawa was stunning, like always, and Iwaizumi was just a bit annoyed at him because he was talking about how girls were already lining up to talk to him. Iwaizumi remembers that conversation to this day, he was so jealous because Oikawa was spending so much time with girls, of course, back then it didn’t make any sense to him why he was feeling that way but now he had an idea why. Oikawa looked at all the pictures and frowned at the one where they went to school. “Ew, Iwa-chan, why’d you pick exactly this picture? I was trying to make you jealous by telling you how many girls were wanting to talk to me but you didn’t even care,” Oikawa’s looked at the ace, his cheeks were a pink shade and he was playfully pouting. Iwaizumi couldn’t help but squeeze his cheeks and for some reason Oikawa didn’t mind it at all, he actually quite enjoyed it. “Well, you don’t have to make me jealous anymore now, do you?” Iwaizumi gave Oikawa a quick peck on the lips and continued telling him about what he had planned for them. Oikawa was literally mesmerized by his boyfriend. He’d known the man since he was little, but now he was looking at him with completely different eyes. “Let’s sit, Babyboy, I prepared you your favourite food,” Iwaizumi was waiting on Oikawa’s response to the pet name he just gave him. Oikawa started to take a seat but immediately stood back up as soon as he processed what Iwaizumi just said. “Hajime Iwaizumi you cannot just say something like that without any warning, are you trying to make my heart explode?” Oikawa was barely able to stand, his knees weren’t able to keep him upright for much longer if Iwaizumi continued saying stuff like that. He loved it, but that completely caught him off guard. Hajime couldn’t help but giggle at Oikawa’s response, he thought it was adorable how flustered he could get. After Oikawa was able to finally calm himself down, they sat down to eat. Iwaizumi turned another playlist he made on and let it play in the background while they ate. At first both men were quiet, they were enjoying the view, the music, the food, each other’s presence. The atmosphere was so romantic, they sometimes looked at one another and blushed a bit at that. For some reason, this wasn’t as awkward as they thought it would be. They were actually really enjoying it. “Sofia” by Clairo started playing and that was Iwaizumi’s clue to stand up. Oikawa looked at him, confusion written all over his face. Hajime walked over to him and stretched his arm out, so that Oikawa would be able to take his hand. 

“Would you like to dance with me?” Oikawa didn’t expect that question from Iwaizumi but he would’ve been a fool if he rejected, so he took his hand and stood up. Iwaizumi wrapped his arms around Oikawa’s waist, and Oikawa slung his arms around Iwaizumi’s neck. Both boys loved this song, they listened to it all the time. It was Makki who played this song during a practice session once and now they were all hooked on it. As the song progressed the got closer and closer. At one point, Iwaizumi was close enough to whisper in Oikawa’s ear. He waited for the perfect moment. “I think we could do it if we try, if only you say you’re mine,” Iwaizumi sang along to the song. Oikawa’s heart skipped a beat, he loved hearing Iwaizumi sing, it made him feel all bubbly inside, it made him happy. 

“But, oh my god, I think I’m in love with you,” they both whispered at the same time, neither of them meant for the other to hear it but they both heard it. They pulled away from each other’s embrace and looked at one another. “Iwa-chan, I know we just started dating but-,” Oikawa was cut off by Iwaizumi. “I meant it, too,” Hajime finished Tooru’s thought for him. The truth is, Iwaizumi realized his crush a long, long time ago. It was when Oikawa and him had to decide what school they wanted to go to. At first neither of them knew. Iwaizumi didn’t really care what school he went to, he only cared about it being the same school as Oikawa’s. He didn’t consciously think that way, it was just that sometimes his mind thought about how painfully difficult it would be not to have Oikawa, a.k.a. the biggest pain in the ass, around him. And every time he thought about having to go to school alone, he felt like he was going to be sick. And when Oikawa told him, he wanted to go to Seijoh, Iwaizumi told him, that’s the school he decided to go to, as well. Seeing Oikawa’s eyes shine and his smile appear on his face made Iwaizumi’s decision right, he felt his stomach fill with butterflies, and that was when he realized Oikawa was more than just a friend to him. And now, after many tears, sleepless nights and many other painfully embarrassing experiences, he was on a date with the love if his life. He didn’t like being so romantical, but he secretly hoped that Oikawa felt the same way he was feeling, happy and so in love.

At first, he wanted to ask Oikawa whether he felt the same way, but he didn’t have to. Just looking at him said everything. 

Oikawa was still shocked by what Iwaizumi said. He couldn’t believe Iwaizumi told him, he loved him. After years of dreaming for Iwaizumi to reciprocate his feelings, it finally happened. He didn’t believe it, it felt like a dream, he has never been this happy before, of course, getting attention from all of the girls in the school was nice but all that mattered to him was Iwaizumi and Iwaizumi only. And now, after years of pining for Iwaizumi, he was able to have all of his attention. They couldn’t be any happier than this. Iwaizumi wasn’t able to hold back anymore and kissed Oikawa. He didn’t waste a second and kissed Iwaizumi back immediately. Both the men smiled into the kiss. Iwaizumi was so in love with the man standing in front of him, it made him sick, he was so scared to let himself go and completely trust Oikawa, but he knew everything would be okay, as long as Tooru was by his side. They pulled away and continued dancing to the songs that came on next. They were having a great time dancing, laughing, just being with each other.  
They lay down on the blankets and pillows after they finished dancing. The music in the background was still playing but now they were just looking at the stars, or at least that’s what Iwaizumi was doing. Oikawa’s eyes were set on the other man. Everything about him was so perfect, it made a shiver go down Oikawa’s spine. He never thought he would end up with him, but he did. Usually Oikawa wouldn’t be sure about relationships, but this was different, this felt right. It just felt like it had to be this was, it was almost as if Iwaizumi and him were meant to end up together. He never told Iwaizumi how much he actually means to him, he didn’t have to because Hajime knew. They didn’t have to talk much, it was almost like the other always knew what he was thinking. Oikawa has never felt like this with anyone else before.

“I just wanted to let you know that I look up to you. I really admire you, Tooru. You never give up on anything and you’re so persistent, it’s really praiseworthy, you know? I’ve never met anyone quite like you,” Iwaizumi was looking up at stars but he could feel Oikawa’s gaze on him. “Iwa-chan, I wouldn’t have been able to get this far without you. You’re the reason kept holding on,” Oikawa responded, his voice quiet. 

It was dark and the night sky was full of stars. The two took pictures, danced, took a break to look at the stars, talked and repeated all of that multiple times until they checked the time, only to see that it was two in the morning and that they both had multiple missed calls from both their parents and most of their teammates. Iwaizumi also had a few texts from Mattsun asking him how the date was going. Iwaizumi decided to ignore it all and give all his attention to Oikawa. 

“Iwa-chan, maybe we should go home, I feel like my parents are worried even though I told them I would be coming home late. You won’t mind, right?” Oikawa looked up from his phone. Iwaizumi smiled and nodded, he was kind of sad that their date was coming to an end but he would see Oikawa soon again, plus, now he was the one dating Oikawa and not some random fan of his. Just the thought of him being the one who gets to spend most of his time with Oikawa made his heart speed up.

They were getting all of their stuff and bringing it back to Iwaizumi’s car. They didn’t talk much, Oikawa really started to feel tired and Iwaizumi felt his throat scratching again, he coughed. He felt light headed and his knees felt weak, he decided it would be better if he sat down for a bit, just until he didn’t feel like he would stumble any second. Oikawa noticed that Iwaizumi wasn’t following anymore so he stopped to see where he was. At first Oikawa didn’t see him but then he realized he was sitting on the ground, he was breathing heavily and he was shaking. The setter rushed to the ace’s side and tried to understand what was going on but Iwaizumi wasn’t able to get a word out. Oikawa was starting to get worried and was about to call an ambulance, when he felt something touch his arm, it was Iwaizumi. “I’m fine, you don’t need to worry about me, now let me bring you home, your mom must be really worried,” Iwaizumi weakly smiled and tried standing up, which he didn’t manage at first but with Oikawa’s help he was ready to bring him home. The setter wanted to talk some sense into his boyfriend but that would’ve been useless since he’s just far too stubborn to listen to anyone. They walked to the car in complete silence.

“Pass me the AUX, I made another playlist, I think you’ll like it,” Iwaizumi connected his phone again and “sugar” by Maroon 5 started playing. Oikawa started giggling, Iwaizumi knew exactly that this used to be one of his all-time favourite songs. Oikawa was singing his heart out and Iwaizumi was just humming alone, still feeling like he wasn’t able to breathe in correctly, he didn’t give that much thought and just enjoyed listening to him boyfriend singing along to his playlist.

When Iwaizumi dropped Oikawa off, it was almost four in the morning. Of course, he walked him to the door and kissed him goodbye. Oikawa thanked Iwaizumi for the amazing night and hugged him. He quickly entered his house and waited a few seconds just to make sure that Iwaizumi wasn’t in front of the door anymore and then he started fangirling over his date. But Iwaizumi heard everything, he waited in front of the door for this reason exactly, he knew that if Oikawa would start fangirling and jumping around, that this date was a success and apparently, it was. Iwaizumi was really glad Oikawa enjoyed the night and he was so thankful that the team helped him organize everything since he wouldn’t have able to organize this all by himself. He got back in his car and drove home; the drive was short since he lived close to Oikawa.  
He didn’t bother unloading everything, he would do it in the morning when he was rested and when he didn’t feel like he was running out of breath after every two steps.  
“Today was great,” Iwaizumi thought and smiled.

\----------------------

On Monday Iwaizumi was feeling worse than ever. He was dizzy and his lungs were giving him a hard time breathing. He was coughing up blood and he was fatigued all the time. He was less hungry than usual and sometimes felt nauseous but that didn’t stop him from attending every practice and his every class. 

“Good morning, love!” Oikawa beamed when Iwaizumi came to pick him up. Hajime felt his heart flutter like it always did when he was around Oikawa. It was insane how he made Iwaizumi forget all his problems by just smiling at him. ‘This boy’s going to be the death of me,’ Iwaizumi thought as Oikawa ranted to him about how his didn’t want to sit right today. ‘Well, it still looks good to me,’ Iwaizumi continued thinking while Oikawa changed subject and started talking about school. Iwaizumi couldn’t help but admire his beautiful boyfriend.

In the changing rooms, Hanamaki and Matsukawa were making out, like most of the times. “Ew, get a room you two,” Iwaizumi pretended to throw up and Oikawa giggled behind him. The two boys just looked at them and shrugged, pretending that they didn’t hear anything. 

After their warm-up they started practicing their spikes and blocks. Everything was fine, until it wasn’t.

Iwaizumi started coughing, occasionally spitting out a bit of blood. He wanted to walk over to a wall so he could support himself but he didn’t make it. His knees gave in and he collapsed on the floor. He was laying on the floor and he heard footsteps running towards him, but the room felt like it was spinning so he couldn’t exactly determine where they were coming from. He tried calling for Oikawa but he was too weak, his voice was quiet and shaky. Looking around wasn’t an option either since he wasn’t able to move his head. He was trying to stay awake but his eyes felt so heavy so he closed them. 

\----------------------

Oikawa was about to set the ball to Iwaizumi when he was him collapse on the floor out of the corner of his eye. He immediately rushed to his side. He had some blood on his lips, his skin was paler than usual and he was cold. Oikawa could feel the tears forming in the corner of his eyes that were threatening to spill. He heard some giggles coming from behind him. “Knock it off you guys, we get it, you’re funny,” Makki and Mattsun were laughing and were already going back to practicing. Oikawa just looked up at the two, his face blank and a tear rolling down his cheek. Matsukawa hurried to where Oikawa was sitting on the floor next to Iwaizumi and told Hanamaki to call an ambulance.

The whole team was gathered around the ace but Yahaba urged them to leave so that Oikawa could try to calm down. In the meantime, Hanamaki had called the ambulance and alerted Iwaizumi’s mother of what happened. Oikawa was trying to understand what was going on. He’s known that something was wrong with Iwaizumi, he had a gut feeling. And this time his gut didn’t have a good feeling. He was eased that Iwaizumi was finally going to see a doctor. They would finally find out what was wrong with him. 

The paramedics showed up soon after and rushed Iwaizumi to the hospital where his mom was already waiting for her son. 

She spoke to the doctor as soon as they diagnosed Iwaizumi. Since he was still sleeping, she was told first. The diagnosis was heart breaking. She expected everything but that. Oikawa rushed into the hospital and was Iwaizumi-san sitting in the waiting room, it looked like she was crying. Of course, Oikawa rushed to her side and tried calming her down without knowing what was going on. Oikawa looked at her, trying to figure out what Iwaizumi had.  
“He has stage-4 lung cancer,” was all she said.

Oikawa just looked at her, his face emotionless. He didn’t know how to react. He knew he should comfort his boyfriend’s mother, but he had to understand what he was feeling first, right? What was this feeling in his chest? Why did he want to scream? Should he be screaming? Why wasn’t he crying? Was it because he didn’t love his boyfriend? 

Oikawa didn’t know what to do. He wanted laugh. So he did. Everyone in the waiting room looked at him. They were all confused, they are all judging him, Oikawa knew, he could tell by their looks. Iwaizumi’s mom was now also looking at him but she didn’t judge him, she took him into her embrace and waited. She knew sooner or later Oikawa would break. It didn’t take longs until the laughter was replaced by desperate sobs. He held on to Iwaizumi-san, since he unconsciously had the feeling she would also be taken away any second now. 

The rest of the team walked into the hospital and saw Oikawa, he looked weak, small. He wasn’t his confident self anymore, he was a completely different person. They were sure he wouldn’t want the team to see his that way so they left. Hanamaki and Matsukawa would text him to check up on both him and Iwaizumi. 

\----------------------

When Iwaizumi woke up, he was greeted by bright white lights and the smell of rubbing alcohol. His eyes hurt from the light. He heard sniffling next to him so he tried turning his head towards where the sound was coming from. Oikawa noticed Iwaizumi moving next to him so his head snapped to look at him. He decided to get a nurse since it was the first time Iwaizumi woke up since being in the hospital.  
“Hey, Babyboy, why’re you crying?” Iwaizumi’s voice was hoarse and he looked tired. Oikawa didn’t know if Iwaizumi was pretending that nothing happened or if he really didn’t remember.

The nurse came to check in on Iwaizumi and told them that his doctor would also come soon to update Iwaizumi on everything that happened.  
“Good afternoon, Hajime, how are you going?” Nagisa-san, the doctor, asked Iwaizumi. “I’m doing well, I guess, thank you,” Iwaizumi responded, he didn’t want to seem rude but he was waiting for what the doctor wanted to say.  
“So, we got your results back, and I’m sorry to say but, you have lung cancer, Hajime,” she spoke. Her voice seemed stern but her expression seemed remorseful. Iwaizumi’s eyes just widened in shock. Oikawa took his hand, squeezing it slightly, letting Iwaizumi know he was there. “How bad is it? There’s still something you can do, right?” Iwaizumi’s voice was breaking. He knew there was nothing there could be done, the look on the doctor’s face was enough of an answer. “I’m sorry, but it’s terminal. You have a maximum of five weeks left.”

Iwaizumi looked down at his lap where his and Oikawa’s hand lay intertwined. After a while he looked back up and thanked the doctor, his eyes glassy. She left the room without saying anything else.  
Iwaizumi didn’t say anything either. He knew that if he said anything now not only him but Oikawa would break down, too. So they sat there in silence. Both of them had so much they wanted to tell one another but neither of them dared to break the silence.

Iwaizumi’s only thought was that he had to make the best out of the next month, right?

\----------------------

Two weeks. Oikawa spent all of his days in the hospital for two weeks. He skipped school, he didn’t go to school, he didn’t care how mad his parents were, which they weren’t, they knew how difficult this was going to be for their son, he wanted to spend all his time with Iwaizumi for as long as he could. At first, he didn’t like the hospital at all, he still didn’t but for some reason he didn’t get chills down his spine as soon as he walked in anymore. Iwaizumi loved that Oikawa was with him all the time, but at the same time, he hated it so, so much. He didn’t have much time left, everybody knew that, so why was Oikawa forcing himself to see him die? Iwaizumi told Oikawa on multiple occasions that he could leave him whenever and start to move on, but all Oikawa would do is kiss him and tell him that he would never leave him. It deeply hurt Iwaizumi because he knew Oikawa wouldn’t get out of this unharmed, Oikawa was going to be the one to carry all the pain, not Iwaizumi. The ace looked down at his partner, he fell asleep on him, like he always did when they watched a movie together. Oikawa was careful not to lie on any of the tubes that were connected to his boyfriend. It pained Oikawa seeing all the tubes connected to him. He remembers he wasn’t allowed to be with him while they inserted all of them but as soon as he came back into the room, he could see that Iwaizumi had cried. 

“Iwa-chan, did they hurt you?” Oikawa asked, concern written all over his face. Iwaizumi shook his head, he didn’t want to tell Oikawa the reason he was crying, since he thought it was silly and irrelevant. “Iwa, you can tell me,” the setter was now even more concerned than he was before, maybe the doctors told him some bad news. “H-how can y-you still l-look at me, I look horrible. How can you not just get up, leave and make this whole thing easier on you?” Iwaizumi was completely serious. A tear rolled down his cheek. Oikawa was shocked, he wasn’t used to seeing Iwaizumi so weak. He knew how difficult this was for him, and even though Oikawa was also feeling completely broken, he couldn’t show Iwaizumi that, he had to stay strong. “Hajime, you look beautiful, you always do, okay? I won’t leave, I’ll stay with you until the end, I promise you that,” his voice broke as he spoke. “I’m sorry,” Iwaizumi was crying, he didn’t know why he was, but he didn’t want to stay strong anymore, he didn’t care about who saw him cry. Oikawa just hugged him and didn’t let go, he didn’t have to say anything, he let his action speak for himself. That was how they fell asleep on Iwaizumi’s first day in the hospital.  
Every day, Oikawa and Iwaizumi pretended that they didn’t know why they were in a hospital, they just ignored it. Oikawa started doing that because he knew it might make Iwaizumi feel better, which it did. The only time he felt like he was in the hospital again was when his friends and family came to visit. 

There was a knock on the door and Oikawa went to open it. The whole volleyball team was standing in front of the door. Their faces were sad but they all forced a smile, trying not to cry. The doctor told them that today might be the last day they see Iwaizumi before they walked in, so they would all have to say goodbye. None of them were ready to do so, but they would regret it they didn’t do it, so they decided to suck it up and get it over with. The first and second years didn’t have much to say. They thanked Iwaizumi for being such a good teacher and thanked him for all the time they were able to spend together. None of them knew what to say exactly since they never had to say goodbye forever. It was ripping their hearts out to see Iwaizumi in the state he was in, but they knew they couldn’t change it anymore. They all cried and Iwaizumi shed a few tears, by now he was used to saying goodbye to them because they came to visit him all three days and they would always say goodbye to him, but this time it was serious, he just wasn’t aware of that. 

Hanamaki and Matsukawa stayed behind after everyone else left. They were both in tears. They didn’t tell Oikawa that this might be their last time seeing Iwaizumi, they knew that if they told him, that he wouldn’t be able to stay strong anymore and that he would just break down. “I guess we’ll both say goodbye, too,” Hanamaki started but immediately stopped when he wasn’t able to hold back his sobs anymore. “Thank you, thank you so much, Iwaizumi. We both love you, and we’ll never forget what you did for us, okay man. I know this probably doesn’t mean much to you, it’s just that I don’t know what to say because I don’t want this to be real,” Matsukawa continued for him but also started crying. Iwaizumi opened his arms so that he could hug both men. He was now crying, too. Oikawa was looking at them and cried as well. He knew how much this all affected them, but they couldn’t change the present. 

Hanamaki and Mattsun decided it would be best if they left now, so without looking back they exited the room and went straight out of the hospital. They looked back once they were standing in front of it and both whispered “never again” before they started walking home. 

\----------------------

Oikawa was the first one to wake up. He doesn’t remember much from yesterday, the only thing that’s really present in his mind is Mattsun and Hanamaki saying goodbye to Iwaizumi. It was different from the other times, this time it seemed so much more real. He didn’t tell Iwaizumi about what he thought, he didn’t want to make this even more difficult for him, he knew how much the ace hated everything that’s been going on. Of course, Oikawa, and everyone around him, knew that Iwaizumi didn’t have much time left. Iwaizumi himself knew, too, he just preferred not to acknowledge it, which the setter didn’t know whether it was healthy or not. Oikawa looked at his boyfriend, every day when he woke up, he was scared he wouldn’t be breathing anymore, Oikawa hated the feeling of his stomach dropping when he didn’t hear Iwaizumi’s heart monitor beep, or when he looked like he wasn’t breathing. Oikawa never told Iwaizumi but when the ace fell asleep, Oikawa would sneak out of the room and get some fresh air in front of the hospital. 

The first few nights Oikawa went outside, he would find a quiet spot to hide and he would cry. He would just sit there and cry for hours and hours at a time. He would think about Iwaizumi and him being happy, about all the time they spent together, the first time they won a match, the first time they lost one, their first fight, the first time they made up, their first kiss…  
Oh, their first kiss. Oikawa couldn’t help but let out an even louder sob then the ones before at the thought of how Iwaizumi asked him out. It seems like it was an eternity ago when actually not more than two months passed since then.  
Two months, that’s how long Oikawa had been able to call Iwaizumi his, and only his, own. Thinking about the ace made Oikawa want to cry yet at the same time, he loves him so much his brain doesn’t want to realize what’s actually going on. It just refuses to. Sometimes when Oikawa wakes up, he thinks it was all just a bad dream and that now everything’s back to normal and he will be happy forever with Iwaizumi. But then he opens his eyes and reality hits him. It just isn’t fair. Iwaizumi doesn’t deserve this, he really doesn’t. When Oikawa looks at his boyfriend, he doesn’t look sickly at all, he looks almost the same as he used to, just quite a bit skinnier. For a split second he thinks that he might be getting better, that everything will go back to normal. But then Oikawa will look at his eyes but for some reason they aren’t the same as they were a month ago. They are dull, almost lifeless, it makes Oikawa want to fall to the ground and just cry. He wants to scream and tell everyone how much he hates seeing Iwaizumi fall apart right in front of him, he would do anything not to see it, but he can’t allow Iwaizumi to be alone, he promised he would stay, and he would, no matter how hard it gets.  
Two months was the time it took for Iwaizumi’s cancer to spread so much not even aggressive chemotherapy could help. Oikawa was with Iwaizumi when the doctor told him. He remembered Iwaizumi’s still somewhat hopeful eyes fill with tears. Oikawa would’ve given anything to erase that memory from his mind.  
After he would be done completely breaking down, he would lay in the grass and listen to the playlists Iwaizumi made for their first date. He would let a few more tears fall and try to figure out how he would live without Iwaizumi by his side. His heart ached, it ached all the time when he was around Iwaizumi and when he was alone. Oikawa knew he would have to live with that forever but he didn’t know how.  
He’s known him since he was little. They spent all their time together, they hung out all the time, they played volleyball-  
Volleyball, right. Oikawa forgot about that. He didn’t know how he would continue playing. He didn’t even know if he wanted to continue playing. It wouldn’t be worth it without Iwaizumi, anyway. He would try to get their team to nationals, he had to, right? 

Oikawa would play with Iwaizumi’s hair, which didn’t fall out since he didn’t have chemotherapy. He would remember how he styled it for their first, and for that matter last, real date. He felt tears forming in the corners of his eyes yet he wouldn’t allow to let them fall, at least not in front of Iwaizumi. Oikawa knew he was sleeping but he still wouldn’t cry. He looked down to Iwaizumi again, he looked so peaceful, he almost looked happy. There was a small smile resting on the ace’s face, that’s when Oikawa couldn’t take it anymore, tears started falling down his cheeks. Iwaizumi heard and quickly woke up. He looked worried, Oikawa tried reassuring him that everything was all right and that he was fine. Iwaizumi knew he was lying, he knew it, yet he didn’t call Oikawa out, he took him into his embrace and let him cry. The ace knew how much Oikawa was suffering, he knew how much his sickness affected him, he was very aware of that.  
He wanted to make Oikawa feel better, he didn’t want to be the one causing his sadness. He looked up at his boyfriend and gave him a weak smile. “Tooru, you need to let me go,” he started, the beeps of his heart monitor getting slower.  
Oikawa knew what was going to happen, he knew, but he didn’t want to accept it. He didn’t want it to be true. “Iwaizumi, no,” he said, his eyes filling with tears. “Please, Iwaizumi, don’t leave me,” Oikawa tried holding back the sobs that were threatening to escape his mouth.  
“I’m scared, Tooru,” Iwaizumi tried to keep smiling, his eyes now also filling with tears. Oikawa cupped his cheeks with his hands and placed a soft kiss on the ace’s lips.  
“Hajime, it’s going to be alright, everything’s going to be fine,” Oikawa tried not to make his voice sound shaky, which turned out to be so much more difficult than he expected. “I’m sorry, love,” was what Iwaizumi was able to say before his heart stopped beating.

Oikawa was left there, sitting on the hospital bed with Iwaizumi in his arms. His breath hitched in his throat. He felt like he was going to throw up, his body felt weak. He heard the faint sound of doctors and nurses rushing into the room but he wasn’t able to move. Tears were falling down his face as he felt someone hug him from behind. He didn’t have to look up to realize who it was. Hajime’s mother was here. Oikawa felt her tears fall of his shoulder and dampening his shirt.  
Oikawa knew he was about to go insane, he wasn’t hearing anyone, he wasn’t feeling anything, his body was moving on his own, he was numb. He stood up and left. At first his pace was slow but it quickened abruptly. He was running out of the hospital, trying to leave it and all the memories he’d made in there behind him. He didn’t know where his legs were taking him. He wasn’t thinking, he was just running.

He sat down. Once he comprehended where he was sitting, more tears fell down his cheeks. It was the playground Iwaizumi used to spend all their time. He remembered Hajime wanting to catch bugs and scaring him with them. His lips curled up to a small smile at the thought of them running around the playground and him screaming at Iwaizumi to stop scaring him.  
Oikawa’s heart was aching, his mind was flooded with memories of Iwaizumi and him, of them being happy. 

Oikawa was alone again.

\----------------------

When Oikawa came home that evening, he didn’t greet anyone, he didn’t say anything, he directly went up to his room. He knew that if he opened his mouth to talk, he would immediately start crying again. His parents didn’t force him to talk to them, either. They let him know that they would be ready to listen to him, whenever he wanted to. Tooru thanked them by bowing his head and left.  
He didn’t want to eat or drink anything, he just wanted to be alone.  
He felt his stomach drop once he entered his room. It’s been a while since he was here the last time. On his bed lay an envelope with his name written on it, Oikawa would’ve been able to recognize that handwriting anywhere. He reluctantly took the letter and opened it. He was hesitant to read it at first, knowing that whatever the content of the letter might be, that it will make Oikawa miss his boyfriend even more.  
\----------------------

Hey Babyboy,  
I’m guessing that if you’re reading this letter I’m already gone and you’re blaming yourself for it. Tooru, we all know it’s my fault, I should’ve listened to you for once, sometimes it really doesn’t help being this stubborn. I’m so, so sorry. I should’ve recognized my feeling for you sooner, because if we would’ve been able to spend more time together, I would’ve been able to show you how much I really love you. But I hope that date I took you on kind of showed you my true feelings for you. I know I was a real bitch to you sometimes, I didn’t mean it, ever, not even when you took what felt like hours to do your stupidly perfect hair. I was trying to hide my stupid crush from you which now that I think about it, I probably wasn’t as good at hiding as I thought I was. Whatever, I just wanted to thank you for everything, thank you for being my friend, my boyfriend, my partner, but most importantly thank you for never leaving my side. If I had the time to write a novel with all the reasons why I love you I would. I would count the stars for you, if that would show you how much I truly love you.

I love you so fucking much and I was never able to show you. I just want you to know that all the playful touches and all the times I hit you in any way was just a stupid excuse to touch you. I’m so stupid, aren’t I?

Tooru, take care of yourself, okay? Please don’t let me stop you from living your life. Fall in love, start a family and forget all about me. Let Mattsun and Hanamaki take care of you and maybe check up on my mom every once in a while, just for the first few weeks, I’m sure this must be hard for her, since dad isn’t here anymore. 

Don’t overwork your knee, remember what the doctor told you, okay? 

Take care of the team, and take them to nationals for me, please, try. I know we dreamed of doing it together but since I’m not here anymore, take them to nationals for the both of us, I’ll be watching you. And if you feel like giving up, talk to someone, please. I know things get rough but you have so many people that care about you and since I won’t be here to help you anymore Mattsun and Hanamaki will help you through it. 

Also, please don’t make my leaving a big deal in the team, okay? Try not to let it get to them, too much. Also, please don’t lose that sparkle you have in your eyes when you play, it makes you look even more pretty then what you already are. I know I told you your hair was stupid, but it isn’t, it’s so soft and just so perfect I want to run my fingers through it while we’re cuddling. Yes, I loved your cuddles no matter how often I told you I didn’t, I just loved seeing you pout about me not liking your cuddles.

I’m sorry I got meaner as we got older. I was just so scared of what would happen after we finished out third year, because I knew you probably would’ve wanted to go pro and I wouldn’t have and that’s how I decided that I would make you hate me in some way or another so it would be easier for you to let go. I’m sorry.

I’ve tried staying strong but it’s just getting too tough for me. I hate seeing you so sad all the time. I hate not being able to see your eyes cheerful and I hate not being able to make you happy anymore. I’m sorry I’m not the reason for your happiness anymore. 

Do you want to know why I got you daisies and now any other flower? They remind me of you, they are so beautiful and so gentle. Also, they symbolize true love and new beginnings which I both found with you. You are my daisy.

I’ll miss you a lot.

I love you, Tooru.

Yours truly, Hajime.

\----------------------

A few days after that Oikawa got an invitation to Iwaizumi’s funeral. He was debating whether he should go or not. He didn’t think he’d be able to handle it. A few days ago, he was able to talk to him, joke with him, touch him. Now, he’s gone, he won’t hear his voice, he won’t hear him laugh he won’t be able to be with him anymore. At the thought of that Oikawa wanted to throw up, it made him sick knowing Iwaizumi won’t be by his side anymore. On his nightstand his phone started ringing.  
“Oikawa, we’re coming to pick you up in twenty minutes, okay? You better be ready,” Hanamaki said over the phone and hung up. That means the decision was made for him, he’d be attending the funeral whether he wanted to or not. 

\----------------------

“Good morning, I’m Oikawa Tooru, I am Hajime’s boyfriend,” Oikawa looked over at Iwaizumi’s picture and took a shaky breath, his eyes were starting to fill with tears again but Oikawa wouldn’t let them fall. He didn’t dare say he used to be Hajime’s boyfriend since he didn’t want to believe that what happened was real, he was still hoping to wake up from what seemed to be his worst nightmare. He looked over at where his two best friends, Hanamaki and Matsukawa were sitting. Their cheeks were still wet from the tears that were falling seconds ago, they tried to stop crying so Oikawa would be able to find comfort in someone’s eyes. Oikawa looked at them, you could see him starting to break again, but Hanamaki and Matsukawa tried to comfort him by giving him a small smile, it seemed like it was working since he looked back up at everyone. “I’m sure Iwa-chan wouldn’t have wanted us to be so sad about everything that happened, and trust me, I’ve tried looking for the bright side of things but there just isn’t anything good about this. He’s gone and we were left behind to mourn about it. No, you know what, this is stupid, I’m not doing it,” Oikawa was about to go back to where he was seated a few moments ago but Matsukawa and Hanamaki stood up and walked towards their best friend. They each stood on either of the man’s sides and held his hand, they slightly squeezed it to tell Oikawa everything was going to be alright. Oikawa took another shaky breath; his eyes were glassy. Two tears rolled down either of his cheeks.

“I didn’t prepare a speech, I actually wasn’t planning on being here today. I somehow thought that I still might wake up and that I’ll find Iwaizumi laying by my side and we could go back to being happy. I can’t believe he’s gone. I don’t want to believe it. What did he do to deserve this? Nothing, and this is the irony of life, isn’t it? Most of you knew Iwaizumi as a stubborn, sometimes even rude person and even though sometimes he really was mean, he was so much more than that. He was such a kind soul and deeply cared for all his friends, he really did. And he always put other before him, he always did, ever since he was a child. I remember when I wanted to watch some movie about an alien invasion and even though he’d been talking about wanting to catch some bug all day long he sat through the whole movie with me and then it was too late to go outside to catch the bugs. I felt so sorry for him because he really seemed excited about it but he looked at me and told me he really enjoyed spending time with me, I knew he was lying, he lied so I wouldn’t feel bad. I don’t know why, but I always remembered him doing such small things for me. They really meant a lot to me. I think Iwa-chan would be happy to know that he’ll be missed, right?” Oikawa’s voice broke. “I wish someone could take me back to the day we met,” He tried smiling, he really did, but sometimes even the strongest people break down. And this was Oikawa’s official breaking point. He started crying, at first it was just a few tears rolling down his face. Hanamaki hugged the hurting man, Oikawa started sobbing into his shoulder, which made the other two men next to him also start crying again. Oikawa looked up again, he whispered something to his two friends and turned to the exit.  
He took off without looking back, neither Matsukawa nor Hanamaki tried holding him back, they knew Oikawa tried staying strong for too long, he needed to get out of here. They still had one another but Oikawa lost the person he grew up with, his best friend, his boyfriend, he must’ve never felt as alone as he did now. They looked into the rows of people crying. They all looked confused as to why Oikawa stormed out like this. “Please excuse him, this is probably hitting him the hardest, he needs some fresh air. I hope you all understand,” Mattsun quietly spoke. Not everyone seemed to understand but they no longer had a puzzled look on their faces. Iwaizumi’s mom knew how much this hurt Oikawa since her husband passed away not too long ago. When she got the news her husband got in a car accident she was shocked, she wanted to cry, to scream, but she couldn’t, something in her was stopping her from doing so. The first time she cried about her husband not being with her anymore was when she had to tell Iwaizumi about it, she cried and cried for hours. Iwaizumi just stormed out of the house and the first place he went to was Oikawa’s. He wasn’t crying but Oikawa knew something happened since the expression his face was different than usual. There was no talking, Oikawa just took Iwaizumi in his embrace and like that the ace spent his whole night crying in the setter’s chest. Oikawa only found out what happened a few days after the accident and since then he was extra careful around Iwaizumi.

This was going to be a hard time for Iwaizumi’s mom but she also knew how difficult it was going to be for Oikawa.

\----------------------

A few weeks passed since Iwaizumi’s funeral. Oikawa wasn’t going to school, he wasn’t eating, he didn’t ever answer anyone’s texts or responded to anyone’s calls, when anyone came to check up on him, he’d just lay in bed and cry. That’s all he ever did, he’d cry and sleep. His parents were concerned, his friends were worried and the teachers didn’t know what to do anymore.

The volleyball club was certainly the most concerned about Oikawa. They’d tried everything to make him feel better. They’d visit him every day, they’d bring him food, they’d offer to watch movies, but nothing worked, Oikawa didn’t ever leave his bed.  
One day, Matsukawa went to visit Oikawa on his own. He was ready to do all the talking and try to convince Oikawa to come back to school.  
“Hey, Tooru, it’s me,” Matsukawa greeted him and sat down next to Oikawa on the bed. “You know, we’ve all been wondering when you’re planning on coming back, we all miss you very much,” he continued. He felt Oikawa move and sit up. His eyes were red and puffy from all the crying. 

“I’m not playing without him.”

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed it!  
> I would enjoy some feedback and constructive critisism.  
> Thank you for reading this story and thank you for any possible advice!


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